


Sick of Losing Soulmates

by kihyukie



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Established Lee Donghyuk | Haechan/Mark Lee, Falling In Love, Fluff, Humor, Kissing, M/M, Stargazing, Time Skips, jeno is whipped bc who wouldnt be when renjun is in question, this is basically one big cliche...enjoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-07 18:31:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16859179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kihyukie/pseuds/kihyukie
Summary: “Do you believe in soulmates?” In typical fashion, Renjun was the first of the two to break the silence.Jeno considered the question for a moment. “Not really, no.”(alternatively: renjun is new to town and jeno all but runs into him)





	Sick of Losing Soulmates

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by [these](https://rottenweb.tumblr.com/post/165489048972) [two](https://yookik.tumblr.com/post/171213367054) posts
> 
> un-beta'd n i only read it over like once so sorry for any mistakes
> 
> enjoy!

_ There will be a heavy rain at 8:00-9:00 today, might you meet someone lovely.  _

 

+++

 

Jeno looked up from where he was standing in line to where the rain was pelting across the sidewalk outside. He sighed knowing he would be soaked to the skin by the time he got home. Thinking a quick trip to the corner store for some ramen wouldn’t take him long, he hadn’t bothered to grab the umbrella sitting in the front closet. 

Wordlessly, Jeno shuffled up to the cashier, handing him over the exact change before she could even announce the total. She smiled and the thought passed through Jeno’s mind that maybe she recognized him from his poor habit of late night snack runs. What a thing to be remembered for. 

With a quiet thank you Jeno made his way towards the exit, pulling up his sweater hood in an effort to keep himself dry once he steps outside knowing it won’t make a difference in the end. It’s pouring buckets outside. 

Funny because the sky had looked clear when he first left the house, nothing to foreshadow the horrible weather now carving its path outside. That’s just the way things are sometimes Jeno figures. They can come out of nowhere and disappear just as fast.  

Jeno pulled open the door, almost hitting a boy he hadn’t seen with it, making a wave of guilt flash through him to his toes. 

“I’m  _ so _ sorry.” 

“It’s ok,” the boy says, his voice ringing through Jeno’s ears, somehow familiar even though Jeno is  _ sure _ he’s never met this person before. 

He’s considerably smaller than Jeno, that much he can tell by a single glance, but the giant sweater the boy is wearing, hood pulled over his head much like Jeno, blocks out many of his other features. All Jeno manages to catch is a tuft of brown hair from under the hood and dark, warm eyes to match. 

Not wanting to cause any further trouble for the other Jeno steps outside, the rain immediately cutting through his sweater, holding the door open for the boy in the process. 

At the same time, the boy reaches to grab the handle of the door, their hands brushing against each other and then he’s gone. Jeno runs the rest of the way back to his apartment, hoping (and failing) to stay as dry as possible, his fingers tingling the whole time. 

 

+++

 

Jeno perked his head up as he heard the bell above the door ring, eyes snapping open. If his mother caught him sleeping on the job he would be dead. At least he wouldn’t be stuck behind the till waiting for his brother to get back from delivery so he could be free to hang out with his friends again, like any teenager at his age ought to be. 

Donghyuck was upset after Jeno had to cancel for the third day in the row, but what could he say? The flower business was booming (or should he say blooming). It’s not like Mark would ever refuse Donghyuck, so at least Jeno knew Donghyuck wouldn’t be sitting alone moping. 

“Hello,” Jeno said with the cheeriest customer service voice he could muster. When he caught a sight of the customer he froze. 

The boy couldn’t have been any older than Jeno himself, especially if his height was anything to go off of. He had dark brown hair that looked like it could use a cut as it hung down in his eyes, but Jeno found it endearing how he had to keep flicking it out of the way. His eyes were dark, a black hole Jeno wouldn’t mind getting lost in - they held more stars than galaxies themselves. 

“Um, I’m here to pick up an order?”

Right. This was a customer Jeno was getting metaphorical heart-eyes over. A customer he had never seen before to make it worse. It was a  _ really _ good thing his mother wasn’t here. 

“Sure! Last name?”

“Huang.”

Jeno ruffled through the memo pad, searching his mother’s handwriting to find the order that matched. 

“Huang...Jiwoo?” Jeno asked, wanting to make sure he had the right order (he had made the mistake before and Doyoung still hadn’t let it go). 

“Yeah.” The boy must have seen the quick hesitation on Jeno’s face and laughed. “That’s my mother, I mean. She wasn’t able to come pick them up herself, so she sent me. Am I still able to get them?” 

Jeno chuckled hoping to ease the others nerves, although he had to admit seeing the other flustered was pretty cute, and gave the boy a genuine (read: not customer service) smile. “Of course, just a minute…”

“Renjun,” the boy - Renjun - offered picking up on Jeno’s cue.  

_ Pretty name _ , Jeno thought. 

“Thanks,” Renjun answered, face turning a pretty shade of red. Jeno froze again realizing he had said that outloud. He was pretty sure his face matched Renjun’s now, it felt like it was on fire and he was kicking himself internally. 

Jeno panicked, busying himself with gathering the flowers needed to make Renjun’s order instead of having to face his embarrassment. It had been awhile since a boy had made him this flustered. Jeno tried to pride himself in being confident in his sexuality and his flirting capabilities, an effect he had probably gained from hanging around Donghyuck.  

As much as he acted like it, Jeno didn’t actually hate working in his mother’s shop. It always smelled fresh, the smell of flowers and other greenery would explain it. To Jeno, it smelt like home. His earliest memories were of following his mother around the flower shop and making her bouquets of dandelions in an attempt to be more like her. 

The work itself was satisfying, his mother came up with most of the bouquet combinations, but Jeno always liked playing around to make his own. Finding what flowers compliment each other and what looked best. 

Finishing up the bouquet, Jeno made his way back towards the front. Renjun looked up as Jeno entered the room, placing a handmade card back where it sat near the front till, a faint smile on his face. 

Smiling back, Jeno passed over the flowers before totaling the order. Renjun passed over the cash, their hands brushing leaving a familiar tingling down Jeno’s arm. Now that he thought about it, there was something so painfully familiar about Renjun. Jeno was itching to ask if they knew each other, but he knew it was impossible. 

Jeno would have remembered meeting such a beautiful boy. 

“Have a nice day.” 

“Thank you. You too...”

Jeno caught on, smiling again, something he felt like he would never stop doing in the presence of Renjun. “Jeno.”

“Pretty name.” And then Renjun was gone, disappearing into the rush of people on the street, leaving behind a very flustered, very enamoured Jeno. 

 

+++

 

“Lee Donghyuck, I will end you!”

Jeno watched as Mark flung a rubber spider across the room, in the direction that Donghyuck had taken off as soon as he noticed the fake bug. Even through his friends terror Jeno couldn’t help but laugh, it wasn’t the first time this had happened, or the second. 

It was the sixth time this week. 

How Mark kept falling for it (or kept Donghyuck around) was a mere mystery for Jeno. 

(Ok, the latter was a lie. Jeno knew Mark and Donghyuck had been friends, and now boyfriends, long before he was in the picture and would probably be for long after too if it ever came to that. 

For as reserved as Mark was and as loud as Donghyuck was, they fit together like puzzle pieces. If Jeno believed in soulmates he would have thought they were the perfect example. 

Two people, two wholes, that came together to make something even stronger than their differences.)

“We’re supposed to be doing homework, not this,” Jeno said waving his hands around to whatever shenanigans his friends were up to. Donghyuck had reappeared after nobody chased after him, poking his head back through the doorway, looking past where Jeno was standing to where Mark resigned to sit on his bed, sulking. 

Within an instant Donghyuck was up in Mark’s face, pressing kisses to his forehead trying to wipe the look of despair off Mark’s face. Jeno almost felt like he was intruding on a moment he shouldn’t, but it was a common enough occurrence between his friends that he no longer questioned it. 

The push and pull was just how they functioned and it was like Jeno was balancing on the tightrope above them. Still part of the equation, but not quite. 

“So are we gonna study more or?” Jeno asked, watching them break apart and come back to reality. To be fair, they had only come up to Mark’s room after Donghyuck complained the kitchen chairs were too hard to sit on and interfered with his ability to concentrate. Mark was the one who suggested they could use his bed instead.

Donghyuck snorted. “God, your such a nerd.”

“It’s actually just Jeno, not God, but continue.”

“Mark can you kick him out?” Donghyuck sent a pleading glance at his boyfriend. 

Jeno beat Mark to the punch, all too ready to rile up Donghyuck. “Then how would you get a discount at Pal’s?”

“Damn.”

“He’s right.” Mark offered helpfully. It sometimes surprised Jeno just how quiet Mark was. Sure, around the right people (read: Donghyuck and Jeno) he could be just as loud and goofy as them, but a lot of the time he seemed to save his breath on non-important issues. Jeno could respect that. 

“Ok. You can stay only beauce I don’t want to pay full price for pizza, but you’re on thin fucking ice. One more bad joke and-”

“Ok, ok. I get it. We’re only friends because you wanna use my relatives to get free food.”

“You know it.”

“Oh hey, speaking of dinner. I invited that new boy from my dance club, the one I was telling you guys about the other day. I hope that’s ok,” Mark looked between the two of them, knowing neither had the power to refuse him, but asking anyways. 

“I hope he likes bad jokes.”

“I hope he likes annoying assh-”

“Cut it out.” Mark stepped in, ever the voice of reason. “Forget studying, let’s go get food early.”

“Anything to shut him up,” Donghyuck tipped his head at Jeno. Feeling five, Jeno stuck his tongue out in return, earning a giggle from Mark. 

“Will your friend be ready if we go now?” 

“Yeah, I can just text him.”

“Perfect. I call shotgun!” Donghyuck said, darting out of the room before Mark was even finished his sentence. Ever since Mark had gotten his licence Donghyuck liked to call dibs on the passenger seat as if anyone would ever try to separate him from sitting beside Mark and face his impending wrath. 

 

_ This has got to be a joke, _ Jeno thought as they pulled up to Pal’s Pizza Place, Mark finding a spot easily as it was never too busy (just busy enough to keep the doors open). It had been around for as long as he could remember. As long as his aunt had lived here Jeno figured. It was where he spent a majority of his childhood, running between booths, waiting with his mother for his aunt to close up for the day. It was where he hung out with Donghyuck and Mark for the first time. 

It was where Renjun was currently standing outside the door looking like a lost puppy. This time he was wearing a grey sweater that was a size too big, coming down over his hands to make sweater paws.  _ Cute _ , Jeno found himself thinking. 

What were the chances he would run into Renjun at Pal’s? The universe was funny like that he figured. 

Things only got funnier when Mark stepped out of his truck and waved at Renjun, the boy waving back. 

A retaliation struck Jeno. “Is Renjun the new kid in your dance club?”

“Yea- wait. How do you know his name?” 

Jeno shrugged, not really wanting to explain why he knew Renjun. He had to keep some air of mystery. Thankfully, Mark let it go easily. 

“Renjun. This is Donghyuck, my boyfriend, and Jeno.” Mark said as they made their way over to where Renjun was waiting near the front door, raising Donghyuck’s had from where their fingers were already interwinted and pointing at Jeno as he introduced them. 

Renjun smiled in amusement, glancing at Jeno. “Not his boyfriend?”

“Not his boyfriend.”

After exchanging greetings they made their way in, Jeno mirroring the smile Renjun held on his face the whole time. They made their way to their usual booth, Donghyuck leading the way. 

“Pretty name,” Renjun whispered as he fell back into step beside Jeno. 

Jeno smiled at the memory. It had only been a week ago and he wasn’t sure if he would ever get to see Renjun again, but he would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about the boy - wondering how he was doing, what he was doing, if his eyes were actually as bright as they were in Jeno’s memory. 

A glance in the dim lighting of the restaurant confirmed they were. Brighter even to Jeno’s amazement. He couldn’t understand how someone so beautiful could exist. 

“Seems like luck is on our side.” Renjun slid in the booth beside Jeno. It’s not like he had much choice as Donghyuck was all but plastered to Mark’s side, but Jeno liked to think Renjun did it because he wanted to. 

“Seems so.”

 

+++ 

 

This time as Jeno made his way to the convenience store there was no rain. 

In fact, the sky was clearer than he had seen in a long time, not a cloud in sight. It was almost off-putting, Jeno couldn’t put his finger on it, but it felt like something life changing could happen. The air was full of promise. 

He made his way to the chip aisle, the craving for something salty bothering him all day to the point where he abandoned his studies in search of junk food. He told himself it wouldn’t take long, which was true; being afternoon many people were still at work. 

Jeno paid quickly and made his way to the door, narrowly missing hitting someone when he pushed it open. A strong sense of deja vu passed over him. He had been here before. 

Instead of last time, he was met clearly with the face of Huang Renjun. It was like something in Jeno’s memory clicked into place. 

“Have we-” Jeno started at the same time Renjun opened his mouth. 

“I think- I think we’ve run into each other here before.”

Jeno nodded numbly. “Was that really you a couple months ago?”

“I didn’t recognize you since you had your hood up that night.”

“Yeah, same.” Jeno fell quiet, not sure what else there was to say. He still couldn’t get over the fact that Renjun was the mysterious boy he had run into months before and how they somehow crossed paths and friend groups thinking they were complete strangers. 

“Would you want to go out sometime?”

_ What? _ “What?” Jeno almost thought he misheard, but the blush on Renjun’s cheeks was a dead giveaway. Here Jeno was thinking he was the confident one, but he had to admire Renjun’s guts.

“You know, like, on a date.” Renjun smiled, one of his teeth sticking out at a cute angle, and Jeno knew it was over right then and there. He was absolutely gone and wanted nothing more than to know Renjun better. Jeno wanted, no needed, to see that smile again.  

Jeno beamed. “Sure!”

“O-oh, awesome,” Renjun muttered as if he thought Jeno would have rejected him. It was as if he did a total 180, suddenly avoiding eye contact with Jeno and cracking his knuckles - something Jeno had observed him do at Pal’s while he debated over what to order. The change in his personality made Jeno even more interested to figure out the boy. 

“I can’t believe I just got asked out by the cutest guy in a convenience store of all places,” Jeno giggled realizing the reality of the odd situation he found himself in. With the blush that rose to Renjun’s cheeks at the comment Jeno quickly decided he wouldn’t change anything about the events.  

“It’s fitting don’t you think? Since we first met here.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is.”

Renjun’s phone buzzed, causing him to look down and giving Jeno a chance to observe him. His hair was slightly shorter than their first meeting, he must have got it trimmed, but it still fell just above Renjun’s eyes as he tilted his head down. It shone under the bright florescent lights of the store. 

“Shit, I gotta hurry, but, uh, I’ll text you and we can figure out a day and time, ok?” Renjun offered his phone over and Jeno took a couple seconds to input his information saving it under Jeno with several hearts. 

“See you around, Renjun.”

“I hope we bump into each other again soon.”

This time when Jeno left, he took his time walking home. The sun is warm against his skin and he felt like he was walking on clouds. This time, instead of sparks, there's a warm constant hum inside his chest, like sunlight spilling through his veins. 

 

+++

 

“Mark, what am I gonna wear?”

“Really? Going to him for fashion advice?” Donghyuck’s voice piped up. It made sense, if there was one of them, the other wasn’t far off. Mark must have put Jeno on speaker phone. “No offence, babe.”

“Ok, Donghyuck, the only one in our trio with a good fashion sense, please have mercy and help me pick what to wear.”

“For what?” Donghyuck’s voice sounded far to sweet and Jeno knew he wouldn’t hear the end of it, but he answered truthfully anyways. 

“A date.”

“With Renjun,” Mark supplied helpfully. 

“Oh, well in that case just wear whatever. As long as you put a bit of effort into it, he’ll love it.”

“Is that it? That’s all your advice all powerful, all knowledgeable Lee Donghyuck fashion king?”

“Do you still have that pair of ripped black jeans from like eighth grade?”

Jeno spent a couple seconds picking through his closet to see if they were still where he last saw them a couple months ago. They were. “Yeah.”

“Wear those.”

Jeno hung up the call.

 

Jeno wore them. In fact, he was amazed he could even still fit them, he guessed he must have hit his growth spurt early and not much had changed since then. Which was a lie, so much had changed, Jeno had a job (yes his own family’s business still counted), his best friends were dating, and he was about to go out on a date with one of the cutest boys he had ever seen. 

That’s what he liked to call character development. 

Jeno pulled into the driveway of what he really hoped was the right address Renjun had sent him. Imagining showing up at the wrong house, stood up by his date gave Jeno the chills. If that was the case he would probably have to move countries and change his name. 

A second before Jeno reached for the door handle, prepared to go up to the door, a small figure darted out the door and next thing knew Renjun was in his passenger seat in his full glory. 

He wore his hair down, he must have showered not too long ago Jeno noted, as it was still slightly fluffy. It made Jeno want to run his hands through it, which is exactly what he did. Renjun stilled under him, not expecting the action, but a moment later he sighed and closed his eyes. 

“Are we gonna go on a date or are we going to spend the evening sitting in my driveway?”

“As long as I get to spend time with you either option sounds like the dream.”

“Oh my god.” Renjun hid his face in his hands. “Just drive, Jeno.” 

Jeno chuckled, taking one look at the very flustered boy beside him before pulling out of the driveway. 

Once they got to the restaurant Jeno hopped out and ran around the front of his car to open the door for Renjun. 

“So chivalry isn’t dead,” Renjun said taking Jeno’s hand when it was offered. His face was burning again and Jeno briefly wondered if this was one of Renjun’s first dates (with his beauty, Jeno doubted it) or if he was just that easy to fluster.

“Right this way.” Jeno swept his arm out, gesturing towards the entrance of the restaurant, which had Renjun giggling at his dramatic actions. It was in that moment Jeno realized Renjun’s laugh might just be his favorite sound in the world. 

The restaurant was a slight step up from Pal’s - which Jeno had nothing against, but he knew if he had brought a date there he would have never heard the end of it from his aunt and mother. Turns out they had both been here before, so they didn’t need much time to figure out their orders. 

“Are you sure you don’t wanna go to a movie after? There’s still time to get tickets,” Jeno asked, putting down his glass of water. 

Renjun shook his head. “I rather talk, you know? I don’t wanna spend time with you and just sit silently in a dark room together. Don’t get me wrong I’d love to go to the movies, but I wanna spend time with  _ you _ , not just in your presence.”

It was Jeno’s turn to flush. Inside his chest, his heart was threatening to burst. Jeno was certain this boy would be the death of him (and he would gladly let him be). 

“I have an idea then.”

The rest of dinner passed smoothly. There was something about Renjun that made Jeno feel so comfortable. Conversation flowed between them easily and Jeno couldn’t remember if making friends with Donghyuck and Mark had been this easy. He didn’t think so. 

Something about Renjun was completely different. 

Jeno learnt that Renjun had moved from China not too long ago. Something he hadn’t agreed with at first, a business opportunity his father pursued, but he said meeting Jeno made up for it, effectively rendering Jeno speechless. Apparently he had been dancing, mainly ballet, since he was a child which is why he chose to join the dance club in town, meeting Mark on his first day there. 

Turns out they also like a lot of similar artists and Jeno agreed they should definitely go to a concert together if the opportunity arose. 

“Jeno, let me pay,” Renjun argued, when he saw Jeno grab the bill from their waitress before Renjun could even see it. 

“You can pay next time.”

Renjun pouted (and Jeno’s heart stopped), but let Jeno pay without further complaint. All Jeno could think about was the unsaid promise for  _ next time, next time, next time _ . 

 

“Do you come here often?”

_ Here _ was a playground not too far from Jeno’s house. Currently, they were sitting side by side on the swings, a blanket Jeno had found in the back of his car sitting on the ground a couple feet away. The park was empty aside from them due to it being a fairly quiet part of the community and the fact that the sun had disappeared awhile ago, the air growing a bit more chilly. 

Jeno resisted the urge to make a poor pickup line out of Renjun’s question and instead answered, “I used to when I was younger.”

Renjun hummed, the answer good enough for him. They spent the next few minutes pushing themselves to see who could get their swing higher. All Jeno could hear was the squeak of the swings and the sound of frogs from the pond not to far off. Looking over, all the air was punched out of Jeno’s lungs; Renjun’s features were illuminated by the moonlight and he looked absolutely ethereal. 

Jeno almost forgot he was supposed to be swinging and not falling in love with the boy next to him. 

“What did you want to be when you were a kid?” Renjun spoke up, breaking the comfortable silence. 

“What are we playing 20 question now?” Jeno laughed, pushing his swing a bit higher, no matter how hard he tried he wasn’t able to beat Renjun. “I wanted to be a fireman.”

“Fitting. You’re strong and I haven’t known you for long but I can tell your the kind and selfless type. You like helping people,” Renjun explained probably after seeing Jeno cock his head in question to his initial comment. 

“My father was one. He, uh...passed away when I was younger.” Jeno wasn’t too sure why he was opening up. It had taken him three years to tell Donghyuck and Mark. Maybe it was the fact that on the old playground, surrounded by darkness Jeno felt as if they were in a secret pocket of the universe, somewhere where anything was possible and safe. He felt safe. “I looked up to him a lot as a kid.”

“I’m sorry, Jeno.” Looking over, Jeno was met with a look of concern and while from anyone else he usually found that look suffocating, he knew Renjun truly meant it. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring down the mood.” Jeno paused before adding, “I was pretty young at the time, I’ve come to terms with it.”

“You don’t need to be apologizing.”

“What did you want to be as a kid?” Jeno asked. While he didn’t really mind talking about his father now, he didn’t want to bring down the conversation even further. 

“Promise not to laugh?” Jeno nodded, curious to hear what Renjun was so afraid of being judged about. “The Tooth Fairy.”

Jeno couldn’t stop the laugh that bubbled out of him no matter how much he tried. 

“That’s so cute,” he cooed, ignoring the pout on Renjun’s face. Once he got control of himself again Jeno hopped off the swing, grabbing the blanket off the ground in one impressive movement. “Come on, I think it’s dark enough.”

Once he found a patch of grass that was flat enough Jeno laid out the blanket, plopping himself down on it and gesturing for Renjun to join him, which he did, tucking himself up against Jeno. 

“They’re so pretty,” Renjun said after they had gotten comfy, Renjun resting his head on Jeno’s outstretched arm like a pillow. It was obvious he was looking up at the stars, which Jeno had to admit, seemed to be brighter than usual, but all Jeno could see was Renjun. 

“Yeah.”

Being in this close range to Renjun was not good for Jeno’s health. They were close enough that Jeno could feel the heat coming off of the other and if he paid enough attention, could even feel the way Renjun’s body shifted as he breathed. It should have been calming, but Jeno felt like his nerve endings were on fire wherever he was pressed against Renjun. 

Even though Jeno knew they were supposed to be looking at the stars, it was his idea after all, he couldn’t seem to stop himself from looking at Renjun. Watching as he lazily blinked, exhaustion pulling at the both of them. Watching Renjun’s hair flick slightly as the wind breezed through it and Jeno wishing it could be his fingers running through it instead and then questioning why it wasn’t, nothing was stopping him after all. 

Renjun himself was the star and Jeno was drawn in by his gravity, helpless. 

“Jeno.” 

Had he been caught? Fuck it if he was. He  _ really _ wanted to kiss Renjun. “Hmm?”

“Do you believe in aliens?”

Jeno snorted, the question catching him off guard. “Do you?”

“Yes.” Renjun sounded so, so sure. Jeno was ready to give this boy his whole heart. 

“Me too.”

“Jeno?” Renjun asked again after a couple minutes of silence. It seemed that even the frogs in the pond across the road were resting. 

“Yes?”

“I really like you,” Renjun confessed, turning so he could face Jeno, but still wrapped up in his arms. Jeno’s heart stuttered, searching Renjun’s face all he saw was pure adoration and sincerity. Jeno’s whole body felt hot knowing the feelings were aimed at him. If his nerves had been on fire before, now they were scorched by honesty. 

Jeno wanted nothing more than to lean forward and kiss the boy in front of him. The one with the galaxies in his eyes. Instead, Jeno smiled. 

“Me too.”

+++

“When did you and Hyuck first kiss?”

They’re walking home from school, just the two of them, which is a rare enough occurence in itself. Mark lived on the other side of town, so usually only walked with Jeno if Donghyuck was there, since the two younger boys were lucky enough to live on the same street. 

Unlucky, for Donghyuck, who had gotten sick over the weekend, and now seeing that it was Wednesday, Mark was on his way to bring a mountain of homework for his boyfriend. (Although, Jeno knew all Donghyuck had to to was flash his puppy dog eyes and Mark would help him do most of it).

“Like the first time or  _ the _ first time?”

Leave it to Mark to speak in riddles. “Uh...the first time?”

“Well the very first time was probably when we were like fifteen. Hyuckie had this date with a boy at the time and said he wanted to practice because he had never kissed anyone before and if there’s one thing about him is he likes to be a perfectionist.” 

That, Jeno knew maybe a little all too well from the various times Donghyuck had overworked himself on assignments for class, staying up the night before to make sure he would get nothing lower than a 95 and then sleeping through lunch and breaks the next day. 

“What about like, after you started dating?”

“5 minutes?”

“Mark!” Jeno slapped his friends shoulder, as Mark dissolved into a fit of laughter. 

“What? It’s true! I had been waiting most my life to kiss him, I wasn’t about to waste time.”

“Efficient, I can respect that.”

“So, why are you wondering?” When Jeno didn’t answer fast enough Mark spoke up again, “Does it have to do with Renjun?”

“I don’t know what to do.” Kicking a rock Jeno watches it hop across the pavement watching where it lands in the middle of the street. He’s not sure where to start or what to say, but he knows he can trust Mark with anything. 

“I feel so comfortable around him. Like I’ve only known him for a couple months, but it feels like it’s been years, you know? It’s like reconnecting with an old friend.” 

After a pause and some consideration Jeno adds, “I told him about my dad the other night. Which, fuck. I don’t know. We clicked so fast, that it just sort of scares me. Like I’ve never felt this way before, not even about Jaemin.”

Mark stayed silent for a moment, probably digesting everything Jeno had just thrown at him. “So then what’s your problem here?”

“I want to kiss him. I don’t know if its too soon since we’ve only been on like, one real date so far and hell, he hasn’t made the move himself, so maybe he doesn’t even want that type of relationship.”

“Jeno.” Mark stopped walking and Jeno realized they had already reached Donghyuck’s house. 

“Yes?”

“It just sounds like you need to talk to him about it. Find where you stand. What he wants from this.”

Jeno knew Mark was right and he knew objectively, talking to Renjun wouldn’t be the hard part, he was just scared of the potential outcomes. 

“Love isn’t supposed to be a guessing game, Jeno.”     

They parted with a good luck and wave before Jeno was alone with his doubts once again. 

 

Jeno thought he was going to die. Scratch that, he most definitely was going to die and Huang Renjun would be the cause.  

It had been Renjun’s idea in the first place: a date to the ice cream parlor. Now Jeno was paying for it. The shorter sat in front of him, laughing at a story Jeno had been talking about absentmindedly, trying to build up the courage to have a serious talk with Renjun.

Renjun leaned forward in laugher, getting ice cream on his nose in the process. There was a warm feeling, creeping through Jeno’s heart, worming its way to make a home there. Everything Renjun did was so,  _ so _ endearing. 

“You have, uh…” Instead of explaining Jeno just took the opportunity to lean across their table and use his sleeve to wipe the ice cream off Renjun’s nose. Beaming as Renjun flushed under his actions. Jeno wondered if Renjun would look similar after a kiss. He absolutely would Jeno figured and wanted nothing more than to test that theory. 

It all came down to the one burning question that had been picking at Jeno’s mind all week. Now was as good time as any to speak up he figured. He had Renjun’s full attention and their table was tucked in the back corner, so they had some semblance of privacy. 

Jeno took a deep breath putting down his bowl of ice cream. “Do you think we’re going too fast?”

Renjun answered almost immediately. “I haven’t even gotten to kiss you yet, Lee Jeno.”

So he  _ did _ want to. Jeno flushed. 

“I just- I mean. I’m gonna be honest with you, Renjun. I like you. A lot, maybe more than I should for the time that I’ve known you and that scares me.” Jeno paused and saw Renjun looking back at him, pure adoration at himself. His heart burned. “I just...don’t want to mess anything up.”

“Is it wrong to just say ditto?”

“Yes! I deserve a heartfelt confession too.” Jeno knew Renjun was joking, but he couldn’t help but sound a little hurt. Even going as far to place a hand over his heart in fake hurt - dramatics he had picked up from Donghyuck no doubt. 

“Oh, Jeno. You deserve a hundred heartfelt confessions. In fact, I’m surprised this whole neighbourhood isn’t worshiping the ground you walk on. Have they met you?”

“Renjun,” Jeno whined. This boy was too much. 

“I hope out of the hundreds, mine is the only one that matters. Is that ok? I like you so much, Jeno. You’ve brought nothing but happiness to my life and I’m so grateful to know you.”

“ _ Renjun _ .” Jeno put his hands on the table and buried his face in them. He felt like he was on fire. 

“God, your  _ so _ cute. Not often you’re the flustered one.” Jeno just buried his face further, not brave enough to face Renjun. 

“Anyways. I think, if we both feel the same, there’s no harm in going at whatever speed works for us. The last thing I would want is to pressure you into something, but if you’re scared of this, us, I don’t think you need to be. I think we’re going to be just fine.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Jeno took another, shallower, breath in. “Can I kiss you now?” 

Seconds after Renjun nodded, Jeno was leaning back across the table, pressing his lips against Renjun’s in a sign of relief. It was like Jeno had been asleep up until now and only now that Renjun’s lips were moving against his was he truly awake. 

The feeling around Jeno’s heart tightened, securing its place. Jeno let it; he wouldn’t have it any other way. Jeno gasped, caught off guard as Renjun bit his bottom lip, licking into his mouth. Jeno smiled at the taste of vanilla ice cream. 

Here, surrounded by the taste and smell of the boy he maybe loved, Jeno felt truly content. 

 

+++

 

“Hyuck! We’re gonna be late, hurry your ass up.” 

“Not my problem Mark didn’t wait enough after I used the liquid eyeliner and ruined it,” Donghyuck yelled from Mark’s room on the second floor.

“Hey! It’s not my fault, I didn’t know.”

“Yeah Jeno, my boyfriend is innocent.”

“I don’t really care, I told Renjun we would be there in…” Jeno looks down to check the time on his phone, “five minutes and it’s still nearly a ten minute drive to his house from here.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Jeno could practically feel Donghyuck rolling his eyes. 

“Don’t make me come up there,” Jeno threatened. He wasn’t planning on it, going through the process of having to take off and put back on his shoes seemed like too much work for such a little task, but Donghyuck didn’t need to know that. 

Soon enough, they arrived at Renjun’s place. Jeno apologizing profusely for how late they were over text. (“It was literally only five minutes, Jen, its okay.” Renjun reassured him later on.) Hopping into the back, Renjun pressed a kiss to Jeno’s lips before facing forward to greet the other two. 

The drive to the arcade was fairly uneventful. Donghyuck and Renjun argued over who should have the aux cord until Mark said they could split it between the ride there and back. Surrounded by his closest friends and holding hands with a cute boy, Jeno knew he was living his best life. 

He smiled, watching the streetlights pass him outside, illuminating inside the car. Renjun was glowing. Jeno briefly thought he had never seen someone as beautiful as the boy beside him and he made sure to tell him as much. He could feel the heat on Renjun’s face on his lips as he quickly kissed Renjun’s cheek. 

 

“Junnie, I challenge you to a duel!” Donghyuck ran towards the air hockey table the second they were in the door and purchased tokens. 

“Oh, you’re going down.”

“Kick his ass, babe.” Renjun whipped around hearing the pet name and Jeno froze, embarrassment rushing to his cheeks. Seeing how flustered Jeno was, Renjun shot him a smile and thumbs up before turning back to face Donghyuck. Even in the low lighting Jeno didn’t miss the matching flush on Renjun’s cheeks. 

“I’m going over here.” Mark tilted his head towards the skee ball machine. “What are you gonna try?”

“I think I’m gonna watch them for a bit. Make sure Hyuck doesn’t accidentally injure anyone.”

Mark nodded, perhaps in good luck before leaving Jeno. 

Donghyuck may have been a fierce competitor but Renjun could hold his ground he had to give him that. Renjun was only two goals behind and was entirely capable of coming back to win. Donghyuck knew it too because he was starting to panic, throwing out harmless insults, even at Jeno who was still just watching. 

“At least I’ve never accidentally locked myself out,” Jeno shot back after Donghyuck’s nth comment about how many times it took him to get his license. 

“It was only the once!”

Jeno glanced in Mark’s direction to see that he was essentially winning at skee ball if that were even possible. Not once, not twice, but four times Jeno witnesses Mark getting the ball in the corners. There’s already a pile of tickets on the floor and Jeno wonders just how many his friend is aiming for. 

“Why don’t you just keep a key under the mat? It’s what I do.”

“Renjun, you’re a genius.” 

Renjun muttered a quiet thanks before sending the puck into Donghyuck’s goal, efficiently tying the game, one point away from winning. He smirked. For a moment Jeno forgot how to breathe and stepped towards the air hockey table, needing something to support himself on. 

“What if someone breaks in though?”

“You probably deserved it,” Jeno shot back at his friend. 

Taking the opportunity of Donghyuck’s distraction, Renjun scored the last, winning goal. Rather drastically, he threw the paddle down, jumping into Jeno’s arms who in turn, held him tight and twirled him around, their laugher mixing into Jeno’s favorite sound.

Beside them Donghyuck was fake gagging, Jeno caught his eye and stuck out his tongue in return. Donghyuck simply smiled and turned on his heels likely to go pester Mark to give him consolation kisses. 

“What else do you wanna try?” Jeno asked against, Renjun’s ear. They had stopped turning, but the smaller boy was still pressed close against his body. Which also meant Jeno could feel the shiver that ran through Renjun. 

“A-”

“Nothing nasty. There are children here.”

“Honestly Jen, who do you take me for?” Jeno shrugged, an innocent look on his face. “I’m not Donghyuck.”

Laughter burst out of Jeno, he simply couldn’t help it. One of the many consequences of being around Renjun. “Of course you aren’t, dear.”

“Fond of pet names tonight are we?” 

“I didn’t- Is- Are they ok?”

Renjun smiled sweetly. “More than ok.”

“You never answered, what other games do you want to try?”

“What’s your favorite?”

“PacMan?”

“Lame.”

“Hey!”

“Let’s go,  _ baby _ ,” Renjun said, grabbing Jeno’s hand and dragging him in the direction of PacMan. Jeno could only hope his face wasn’t as red as he felt it was. 

 

They were at the park again. Mark and Donghyuck had both made their way home, but Jeno wasn’t quite ready to give up his time with Renjun yet. With the intenitisty Renjun had agreed to Jeno’s stargazing plans Jeno knew the boy felt the same. 

Once again, they had spread a blanket out on the flattest piece of ground they could find. Renjun curled up to Jeno’s side, warmth flowing between them. Jeno smiled faintly to himself, there was something magical about moments like these that he wanted to last forever.

“Do you believe in soulmates?” In typical fashion, Renjun was the first of the two to break the silence.

Jeno considered the question for a moment. It was never something he spent much time thinking about, which was an answer in itself. “Not really, no.”

“I think they’re fun to think about.” Renjun shifted so his head laid on Jeno’s outstretched arm now instead of his chest, allowing him to better face Jeno. “That there’s someone you have a special connection to and can immediately feel at home around. Meeting them would feel like finally waking up, finally living because finally you found your way back to the person your soul’s been missing.”

“They don’t sound so bad when you put it like that.”

“It’s sad too, because what are the chances you’ll find your soulmate?”  _ I have you, _ Jeno’s brain unlessly supplied and he caught himself from saying it outloud. Suddenly having Renjun’s attention on him was too much. 

Jeno felt  _ seen _ . 

“How would you even know if you met them anyways? It’s not like we have any way of knowing. What if you pass them on the street and never cross paths again? It’s sad because even if you feel like you’re  _ so certain _ you’ve found your soulmate, things might come up. One might not feel the same way, one might have to leave. A thousand things might have come together so you could meet, but a millions things could come up to tear you apart.”

“Now  _ that _ , sounds complicated and tragic.” Renjun made a noise that Jeno wasn’t sure was to agree or disagree.

“Would you want to know your soulmate? Like if they were real.”

Given Renjun’s theory, Jeno contemplated the question seriously before replying. “I don’t think so.”

“Even if it cost you a chance at true happiness?” If he didn’t know any better, Jeno would have guessed Renjun sounded surprised. 

“Damn, Renjun, when did you turn into a philosopher?” Jeno huffed, but quietly added, “I think I’m pretty happy with you right now, so why would I change that?”

With that, Renjun propped himself up on his arm so it was looking over Jeno, a twinkle in his eye. They shone brighter than the stars above and Jeno wanted nothing more than to melt into their warmth. 

It was Renjun this time who took the initiative to lean forward and press his lips against Jeno’s. Immediately, Jeno relaxed into the kiss, letting out a sigh he didn’t even know he had been holding. 

“You’re such a sap, baby.”

“Sue me.” Jeno smiled against Renjun’s mouth before leaning back in for more.

 

+++

 

Waking through the doors of the convenience store Jeno couldn’t help but smile, this was where thing’s had begun after all. Weirdly enough, things always came back to the store. What an odd place to have such important memories, in Jeno thought. 

Wandering towards the back, Jeno ran into a familiar face (who admittedly, was not who he had been hoping to come across, but Jeno didn’t let it show). 

“Hey champ,” Donghyuck said, a bag of chips and chocolate milk (Mark’s favorite) in the other.  

“Champ?” Jeno choked back a laugh. Something was up with Donghyuck and now he was about to figure out what. 

Donghyuck smiled weakly. “How’ve you been holding up?”

“Fine.” It sounded more like a question. “Oh hey, have you heard from Renjun lately?”

“On my god.”

“What?” The cold feeling that ran through Jeno’s body and swirled in his gut was unpleasant and unwelcome. 

“Oh my god.” Donghyuck swore quietly enough under his breath that Jeno couldn’t catch it and he wished he could say the same about the next words out of Donghyuck’s mouth. “He’s gone, Jeno. He moved.”

Jeno’s world halted, something like a roller coaster stopped at the top of the peak before barreling down, moving much too fast.

“Jeno!” He heard Donghyuck calling out behind him, but it wasn’t enough to get Jeno to stop to process it or respond. Suddenly fighting for air, Jeno pushed his way out of the store, an unreal tingling feeling growing across his body. Jeno felt as if his heart would swallow him whole. 

He almost wished it would. 

This wasn’t real right? Renjun wouldn’t move without saying it. Like he could hide such a thing. Yes, this was all a very elaborate prank from Donghyuck. Jeno would knock on Renjun’s door and jump into his (considerably smaller) boyfriends arms as soon as he opens the door. 

Caught up in thought, Jeno only realizes he’s made it to Renjun’s house when he steps onto the very empty driveway. His feet must have found their own way here only after visiting a handful of times. 

Now that Jeno’s thought about it. He rarely visited Renjun’s house. Either they were at his or out and about in town somewhere. For all he knew, Renjun could have been packing to move, since the last time Jeno was over (which had to be more than a month ago), never speaking of word of it. 

Jeno felt absolutely sick. 

Taking all the courage he could muster, Jeno knocked weakly on the door and prayed for an answer. At one point he could have sworn he heard footsteps, but nobody came. 

Jeno knocked louder, once more in case Renjun didn’t hear it the first time. No answer came. 

A key. Renjun kept a spare key under the mat. 

Jeno knelt to the ground, ignoring the pain in his knees when he dropped rather roughly. Lifting a corner of the mat, he swept his other hand across the ground feeling for something, anything. 

Expecting to be met with cold metal, Jeno was puzzled when he felt something smooth. Pulling back, Jeno looked at the envelope in his hand. Flipping it over, Jeno saw his name written in clear cursive, barely legible due to how bad his hands were shaking. There was a small heart to the left of it, Jeno felt tears prick in his eyes against his will. 

Jeno debated leaving the letter and pretending none of this was happening, he really did. 

Instead, wanting to hear Renjun out, he opened it. 

 

_ Jen,  _

 

_ I’m sorry for not telling you I was leaving. I truly am.  _

 

_ My dad’s job didn’t work out. I wanted to tell you, but I never found the time to break the news and well, now I guess I’m gone.  _

 

_ I don’t think I’ll ever forget you. You’re the most compassionate person I’ve met. You have so much love to give and I count myself so lucky to have received a piece of it. The time we spent together was probably the happiest I’ve ever been. You never failed to make me laugh or flatter me or cheer me up. I don’t know how to repay you for the happiness you’ve given me. Please don’t forget me.  _

 

_ I’m not asking for you to wait for me, that wouldn’t be fair for either of us. That being said I hope our souls are able to find their way back together.  _

 

_ I think you’re my home, Lee Jeno.  _

 

_ With love,  _

  
_ Renjun                   _

**Author's Note:**

> i had a ton of fun writing this one!! i starting writing without any plan but i really like the way it came out hehe
> 
> hyuck wearing markup in fics is a cliche youll have 2 pry from my cold gay hands.....n yes mark is a lovely bf who lets hyuck experiment new looks on him!
> 
> it has also come to my attention theres a severe lack of markno fics in this world so....maybe that'll b my next project 
> 
> anyways enough rambling i hope u enjoyed this!! tell me what your favorite part or line was?
> 
> [twt](https://twitter.com/KIHYUKlE) | [cc](https://curiouscat.me/kihyukie)


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